101 Long Distance Date Night Ideas for Military Couples

Missing your spouse more than you thought humanly possible, wishing you could just cuddle up on the couch together for a casual date night? Being in a relationship with someone in the military is hard—but here’s the thing: you can still make date night happen, even when you can’t be side by side. It’s not the same, we know, but it’s absolutely worthwhile, because date night is essential to a strong marriage no matter the distance between you.

When you and your spouse are separated by miles (and miles, and miles), you have to get a little creative. So we’ve gathered 101 of our favorite long-distance date night ideas for military couples—organized by how much access you have to communicate. Phone only? Video chat? Snail mail? There’s something here for every situation. This guide is part of our complete military marriage series—you’ll find links to every stage of deployment at the bottom.

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18 Phone Date Nights

Fun ideas for keeping the conversation and laughter going when all you’ve got is each other’s voices.

1. Bucket List — Make plans for all the fun dates you want to do once you’re back together. Anticipation is half the fun!
2. Sexts — Send each other steamy texts with a little help from these ideas.
3. Picture Texts — So much better than words alone, these picture messages will put a smile on your spouse’s face in a second.
4. Scattergories — Compete to list words or phrases that describe your relationship—everything has to start with the same letter!
5. Comedy Date — Laughter is the best medicine for tough days apart. Plenty of these only need your voice.
6. Interview — Ask thought-provoking questions to get even more insight into your spouse.
7. Prayer — The power of prayer isn’t lost over the phone. Pray for each other and with each other to feel spiritually connected.
8. Book Club — Share favorite books—classic or new—and talk all about them.
9. Mad Libs — Get each other laughing with love-inspired fill-in-the-blank stories.
10. Speed Dating — An (almost) endless supply of categorized questions to ask each other in a set period of time.
11. Believe It or Not — Incredible, disgusting, and amazing facts… and fiction. See who can spot the truth!
12. Sexy List — Plan for those intimate moments when you’re reunited.
13. Shoe Fits — Modify this game a bit and learn how your spouse feels about all kinds of moments with these fun questions.
14. Pillow Talk — You’re not sharing a pillow, but you can both rest your heads as you chat and feel a little more tied together.
15. Truths and Lies — Can you detect your spouse’s lies? How well do you really know them?
16. Getaway — Plan a romantic getaway to take when your spouse returns. Use the checklist so nothing’s forgotten!
17. Conversation Starters — When the chatter starts to lull, these give you endless talking points.
18. Sexy Talk — Turn up the heat with these intimate pillow talk ideas.

16 Virtual Date Nights

Got a tablet or computer with internet? You’re all set. Video chatting makes these the most fun, but many work even if you’re not face to face.

19. Virtual Tours — Tour a few famous landmarks—virtually, together!
20. YouTube Night — Laugh, cry (with laughter), and laugh some more hunting for the funniest videos on the internet.
21. Online Shopping — From big household purchases to a cute new date-night outfit, shopping together and swapping opinions is tons of virtual fun.
22. Shared Pinterest Board — Keep a shared board to show each other your favorite ideas for redecorating the house or recipes to try.
23. Screenshots — While video chatting, get goofy and snap screenshots of your conversation like a photo booth.
24. Time Capsule — Use a scheduled-email tool to build a digital time capsule of memories, set to open once your spouse returns.
25. Karaoke — Sing your hearts out to each other. Sites like SingSnap have the songs and lyrics ready to go.
26. Mashup Pics — Plan out photos to take that you can splice together into one creative, connected image.
27. Virtual Museum — Google Arts & Culture lets you explore some of the world’s most popular museums without leaving home.
28. Freeze Selfies — Text your spouse “FREEZE”—the second they get it, they snap a selfie so you can see what they’re up to.
29. Charades — Get up and moving to play charades during your next video chat.
30. Skype & FaceTime — A date idea made for long distance, packed with fun video-chatting ideas.
31. Shared Shows — Use a watch-party tool like Teleparty to stream movies at the same time—react and get scared together, no muting allowed!
32. Online Games — Board games make some of the best date nights, and you don’t have to skip them just because you’re apart. Play online!
33. Phone Games — Play your latest favorite game together from anywhere.
34. Couple Apps — Stay connected with a relationship app built for two. See our roundup of the best apps for couples for our favorites.

21 Date Nights in a Box

Send a few items as a care package to make up for all those missed date nights.

35. Open When — Send your spouse a whole series of boxes to fit any date-night mood.
36. Superheroes — Not your average movie night—send the latest superhero movies plus printable activities to do together.
37. Inner Child — With all the stresses of military life, acting like a kid again is a huge stress reliever. Let your spouse release their inner child!
38. Kisses — You can’t send the real thing, but a bag of chocolate kisses just might ease the ache.
39. Popcorn Bar — Send the fixings for a popcorn bar—just choose snacks that travel well.
40. Flat Spouse — Create a “flat” version of yourself to send along as a pocket spouse for date night.
41. Long Distance Kit — More long-distance care-package ideas than you’ll know what to do with.
42. Love Boat — A survival-themed care package, made even more fun with a toy love-boat invite sent ahead.
43. Movie Bingo — Send a movie plus Bingo cards (keep some for yourself) and see who fills their board first.
44. Harry Potter — A full movie marathon, plus hilarious photo-booth props to share.
45. Postcards — Send blank postcards and request some romantic ones back. Spend date night writing sweet notes to each other.
46. Date in a Bag — Easy-peasy: add a date to a bag, add that bag to a box, and you’re all set.
47. Heart Attack — Lots of cute ways to “attack” your love with hearts—imagine them opening a box bursting with them!
48. Cheer Up Kit — Being apart is rough, so cheer your spouse up with bright printables and fun treats.
49. Half Box — Use holiday care-package printables to send a box of half-finished items for your spouse to complete—a coloring page, a word search, even a journal entry.
50. Legos — Everyone loves building. Package up a set with a few challenges and send it across the miles.
51. Cookies — Homemade cookies are the ultimate gift from home and a sweet way to celebrate date night.
52. Series of Dates — Choose from date boxes ranging from “adventurous” to “romantic.”
53. Staycation — Give your spouse a little holiday in the form of a vacation in a box.
54. Favorite Things — Fill a box with as many of your spouse’s favorite things as you can.
55. Birthday Celebration — Let your spouse know you’re thinking of them on their big day, even from miles away.

18 Long-Distance Shared Experiences

Date night is about making memories together. Even if you can’t do something side by side, you can share the same experience—agree to do the activity (at the same time or before your next chat) and compare notes afterward.

56. Movies — Watch the best shows and movies “together” with our ultimate list to help you choose.
57. Sunsets — Watch together if you share a time zone; if not, know your spouse saw that same sun not long before or after you.
58. Our Love Story — Write down everything that led you to this moment—for posterity or just for yourselves.
59. Running — The Runkeeper app lets you track each other running (or walking!) and cheer each other on.
60. Resolutions — Set goals together and keep each other motivated with texts, emails, or packages.
61. Bookstore — Head to your nearest bookstore, complete the activities, and share how it went.
62. Dream Home — Build your dream home online together—each add one item a day and let the other guess what it is!
63. Stargazing — You can’t cuddle under the stars, but you can both look up at the same sky.
64. Couponing — The couple that saves together, stays together! See who can clip the best coupons.
65. Takeout — Order the same thing, or order for each other and let your spouse be surprised.
66. Podcasts — Listen to the same episodes and bring up the interesting topics and debates next time you talk.
67. Articles — Share articles about your interests, annotate them, and discuss by phone, email, or snail mail.
68. Journaling — Answer the same journal prompts, then compare notes next time you chat.
69. Bible Studies — Start by sharing a favorite verse and work up to studying larger sections together.
70. Playlists — Build your own couples playlist to listen to whenever you’re missing each other.
71. Crafts — Find something to create together or for each other—we love these long-distance gift ideas.
72. Online Classes — Learn a new language or skill together, or host your own online classes to teach each other something new.
73. Recipes — Each test out new globally inspired recipes, then compare your dishes afterward.

13 Long-Distance Couples Challenges

Everyone loves a little friendly competition, and you can still name a winner even when you’re miles apart. Challenge your spouse to one of these—same time zone or not!

74. 21-Day Habits — Start some great habits right now. Mark your calendars and get to it!
75. Town Hunt — See who can check off the most activities in their town.
76. Garden — Split a packet of seeds or a single plant, each grow your half, and see who has the greenest thumb.
77. Acts of Kindness — See who can spread the most kindness. What a lovely competition!
78. Unplug — Drop the devices and play some good old-fashioned pencil-and-paper games you can mail back and forth.
79. Save Up — Start a fund for your next couples getaway and see who can contribute the most. Our budgeting resources can help!
80. Photo Letter Names — Armed with your camera, hunt for the letters of your last name out in the world and see who’s most creative.
81. Funky Town — Challenge your spouse to find the funkiest outfit, send it your way, and then you have to try it on!
82. Dollar Store — The perfect challenge for the cheapskate in all of us—send a couple of dollars and see who can spend the least.
83. Photo a Day — Send the grossest, funniest, most beautiful pics and challenge your spouse to beat you at your own game.
84. Service — Go out and do good for as many people as you can. There are no losers in this one!
85. Selfies — Go on a selfie scavenger hunt and see who checks off more than their spouse.
86. Sudoku — Grab two copies of the same puzzles and time yourselves to see who’s the quicker mastermind.

15 Long-Distance Date Night Tips

Hard-won hints from couples who’ve lived the long-distance and military life. These will make date night go so much more smoothly.

87. Decorate the Box — If you’re shipping a date in a box, don’t forget the box itself—set the tone for the date. We’ve got printables for holidays like the Fourth of July too.
88. Send Invites — Plan way ahead and send an invitation to set a time and place to focus on just the two of you, even from afar.
89. Time Clocks — Add your spouse’s time zone to your phone’s world clock, or hang a second clock set to their time so they feel a little less far away.
90. Look Your Best — It may feel odd to get ready for someone you won’t see in person, but it makes your date night feel special—especially on video.
91. Double Up — When you shop, buy two of something and send one to your spouse. It’s like sharing the treat together—only you each get the whole thing!
92. Get a Sitter — Make date night a priority and get a sitter or put the kids to bed first, just like you would for a regular date.
93. Set the Mood — Decorate your space for virtual dates—twinkle lights or a banner—and dedicate a special spot for those conversations.
94. Spray Perfume — An old trick: spritz your perfume or cologne on whatever you mail so the scent takes your spouse right back home.
95. Take Photos — You’re still making memories, so document them—and tuck a few prints of past date nights into your next care package.
96. Virtual Notes — Add fun ideas and sweet little notes to a shared virtual bulletin board.
97. Postal Savings — Use flat-rate boxes whenever you can, and ask about Media Mail for books or DVDs—it’s often much cheaper (depending on your spouse’s location).
98. Digital DVDs — Buy DVDs that include a digital copy code so you’ve got two “copies”—send one, keep one, and watch together.
99. Good Questions — Long distance is all about great conversation, so learn to ask good questions. Jot a few down during the week for your next date.
100. Flirt — Build anticipation all week with flirty texts: “Can’t wait for Friday—I have a surprise for you!”
101. Set a Date — Put a standing date night on your calendar. Even if your spouse can’t commit to a time, that protected space keeps your marriage a priority.

We can’t get enough of date nights, and with 101 ideas to choose from, we know you’ve found something to get you excited for a special moment with your love. So go get something started!

A Roadmap for Every Stage of Deployment

Long-distance date night is just one piece of the deployment journey. Wherever you are in the cycle, we’ve got a guide for you:

• Military Marriage: Staying Strong Through Deployment & Distance — The big-picture guide to keeping your marriage strong through every phase.
• Saying Goodbye — Thoughtful ideas for the days before a deployment and parting with your heart intact.
• While Apart — How to care for yourself and stay closely connected once the deployment is underway.
• Coming Home — Celebrate the reunion and ease back into life together after deployment.

Long-Distance Date Night FAQs